It does not matter whether you have over 25 years
experience managing one or many relationships or a novice in this zone,
each one of us have our own ideas of Romance. The definitions are as
diverse as the person whose idea it is. Every relationship starts with
romance, but somewhere in between life with its banalities come in the
way. Whatever your beliefs and notions may be about Romance, I have
drawn up a list which according to me are the most common myths about
Romance:
1. No difference between romance and sex. Completely
wrong notion. Romance can, in the least, is a precursor to sex. If a
person becomes romantic, with only sex in mind, he will soon meet his
Waterloo. Consider romance as a mere “mental foreplay”. It helps you to
inform your loved one what your feelings are and that you have taken
care to express your feelings.
2. Romance has no place in a
relationship. Agreed, our work, hobbies and everything sometimes get
higher priority than just romancing. But let us not forget that it is
the romance in our lives, with our partner, that holds our lives
together. It is that proverbial cementing factor which keeps our
balance and keep us on track – not just with the partner, but with life
in general. It is truly the pivot of life.
3. You need cash to be
romantic. No way. You don’t have to flaunt your bank balance to be
romantic. It’s all about making some small wishes and dainty dreams
come true. Many times, pulling up a chair, opening the door, carrying a
heavy bag for your partner or just paying a compliment on how she is
looking today, takes you miles ahead in a romance, which no amount of
expensive gifts and dinners can achieve.
4. Romance needs extra
time and more extra effort. While I agree that some aspects of romance
is indeed time consuming, but a whole lot of small and insignificant
things can add a lot of romance to your relationship. Simple acts like
making that phone call at the most unexpected time, turning the lights
low, putting on her favorite music as she enters the room or prancing
in the kitchen while dinner is getting cooked, can enliven and rekindle
romance in your lives.
5. Romance is a woman only topic. It is a
myth that women take the lead when it comes to the mater of romancing.
Both men and women can jointly hunt out romance. The only difference
lies is a romantic person thinks up of various small things to add that
spark, whereas an unromantic person hardly has any innovative ideas.
6.
Candy and flowers are enough. Of course they work in a romantic
situation but don’t you think it has become very cliché? Try adding
something new to the old thing. Present her with flowers and candy at a
place where you first met or kissed. Doing or even thinking of doing
this small extra bit, takes you a long way.
7. You’re either a
born romantic or you can’t do it. I fully agree, you can’t fake
romance. However there is nothing yet discovered called the “romance
gene”, with which guys like Richard Burton or women like Marilyn Monroe
were born. You need not be born with any special talent to be romantic.
If it does not occur to you naturally, you can always take tips from
books, internet or even TV. And the best thing about romance is that
you can spread romance. You be romantic with your partner. Chances are
that your partner will definitely reciprocate.
8. Saying I love
you is enough. You can say this a hundred times during the day but it
still may not be enough, if you are thinking of true romance. Actions
speak louder than words here. Do something to show, take a small step
to prove that “I love you” than just saying it. Write I love you on a
small Post –It and stick on the bookmark of the book she will read
before she goes to bed. Or write those magic words with a toothpick on
a slab of butter at the breakfast table. Think and think hard. You will
find many creative ways.
9. Romance needs a lot of preparation.
The best part about romance is that there is no tried and tested
formula which one can follow. Because the whole mater is subjective –
what you find romantic might be silly to another. Devise your own
ways…do something that matches your capabilities, and more importantly
do something which your partner finds equally romantic. If you are
clueless, ask, they are glad you took interest in the subject.
10.
Its more than enough to be Romantic on Valentines Day and Sweetest Day.
It is expected of you to be romantic on special days like these and
your anniversary, birthdays etc. But can you be romantic all year
round? Can you be consistent with your romantic ideas? If you can, then
you have the key to a most romantic relationship of your life time.
Something where the spark is permanently on.