Relationships can be the most wonderful - or most terrifying things that many of us experience. The hurt, pain and devastation of a breakup is the kind of pain most want to avoid at all costs. The feelings of loss can be overwhelming. Moving ahead seems impossible. This is particularly true when you haven't fully recovered from the previous relationship. There are some relationships are just harder to get over than others. How you plan your recovery is crucial to your success in future relationships.

Leaping into a new relationship is never good plan of action before you've dealt with putting that old hurt behind you. At the same time, you don't want to lock yourself away from the world in hiding for or years while you struggle to put the pieces of your heart and soul back into place. You deserve to enjoy life.

One thing you want to make absolute certain is that you aren't setting yourself up for the typical rebound relationship. Rebound relationships are rarely healthy for either party and may leave you even more deeply wounded than before. Allowing sufficient time to pass before getting involved with another potential partner can lessen the risk of rebound fallout.

One thing you must do in order to move on is confront the past and recover from it rather than allowing it to continue controlling you. In most cases, this is much easier said than done but it's a growing pain that will clear that path for better relationships to come.

Time doesn't heal all wounds (and neither does 2 pounds of chocolate or a pint of ice cream) and there are times when it's in your best interest to be proactive in your recovery rather than just react to intense pain you maybe feeling.Eventually your pain will subside, but you must find a way to push forward positively.

The absolute best gift you can give yourself while recovering from a breakup and beginning a new relationship is to apply some of your time, strength, and energy into learning to love yourself again. Yes, learn to love you! You are your best gift and your best asset. Just because things did not work out with your last relationship, it does not have to determine your future.

Discover the things you like about yourself and the world in general. Filling your life with good things will go much further for your recovery and the good of future relationships than dwelling on the failures and hurt of the past.

If you're having trouble letting go, you need support. There's no shame in this. Your self-esteem takes a hit when a relationship ends, particularly if it ends badly. We can help with your recovery.