It used to be that your dating prospects came from a very narrow geographic range, and forced separations were very stressful on the fabric of the relationship due to slow and infrequent communication. Today with chat rooms, instant message, email, cell phones, unlimited long distance plans, and even web cams, not only has that geographic range expanded to worldwide, but communication has become instant.

Some of the time long distance dating occurs because a couple that met locally becomes separated by factors such as school, military service, or job assignments. Other times the dating occurs because the potential date lives far away when first encountered. Regardless of why the separation exists, the ability to communicate almost constantly gives the long distance dater as much chance for success as their local dating counterparts. Communication is widely viewed as one of the essentials of a successful relationship, and there is no reason why this should be neglected.

One pitfall of the long distance dater, especially the one who first meets the potential date with the separation already in place, is the tendency to think of the long distance partner as somehow less important than the date down the street. This is expressed in the world of internet dating by the use of “online” relationships as opposed to “real life” relationships. Rest assured that considering your dating relationship as a little less than real life will ensure that it will not flourish, nor will it last long.

We have shrunk the world with our technology. No longer need we look around our own neighborhoods for dating partners. The world has become our own private singles bar, but the cost we pay for this is the acceptance that long distance dating is going to occur, and it is going to cause a certain amount of frustration. While we are able to communicate, and this is good, it is not that comforting to lean our heads upon a computer monitor, or give a cell phone an affectionate hug. Although kissing a web cam lens might be as good a clue to feelings as a kiss on the doorstep after a date, it still is going to fall short of the real thing.

The secret to successful long distance dating is communication, and the thrust of a lot of that communication should be how to shorten that distance, all the way from many miles to a few inches.